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Month: April, 2010

Day 28, This year, in great detail

I’ll start with April, 2009.

April 2009:

I’m in my second to last month of High School. I take this photograph, which to this day stubbornly refuses to drop out of Flickr’s Explore pages, much to my surprise. This month is filled with things I will theoretically remember for the rest of my life: prom, finishing my A.P. Photography portfolio. I walk the halls with great confidence, finally feeling comfortable enough to actually socialize with people, unlike the previous three years.

May 2009:

More important stuff happening, like graduation, for instance. I have that cliche ‘I can do anything’ feeling. But I am also kind of sad because I’m finally leaving high school at a time when I actually like it. I don’t actually think that I will really see any of these people again, and that makes everything bitter sweet.

June 2009:

I finish my 365 Day Project, which makes me feel more accomplished than graduating high school. I get a job at a newspaper, answering phones and typing up classified ads. I take great pleasure in driving home with the windows rolled down and “Never There” playing on repeat in my car.

July 2009:

I turn 18 on July 30. Steele house-sits for a family with a very nice house, in which this picture was taken. I start my ’25 Possibilities’ project, which I am convinced will be finished before the end of the summer but actually takes me until March.

August 2009:

I take a short trip to the Sand Dunes with Crrr and Cornie. I pack up all my belongings and drive with Steele, to Oregon. To Portland. To College. The drive takes us two days. We arrive on the hottest day of the summer.

September 2009:

I find that routine is easy to find anywhere. Steele and I have an incredibly comfortable bed, which makes it hard to get up before 11. My classes start, and when Steele and I talk about potential friends I say “There’s Molly.. from Maryland” and he says “That girl Ali seems cool, but she’s really quiet.”

October 2009:

I go to a party with Steele at a boy named Matts house. I have my first photo critique on a project titled “The City” which I like to call ‘Quiet Moments’ Steele turns 19 and I bake him a cake and send him on a scavenger hunt, to find a Nixon watch. (A very mature birthday present, if I don’t say so myself.)

November 2009:

I take a photograph which I will cherish forever. I come up with a concept for my final photo project, for which I need a model. While casually talking about it with Molly in drawing, Ali offers herself up. Thus, we are friends. Steele and I go to her house for Thanksgiving, and have a grand time.

December 2009:

The 14th is Steele and I’s two year anniversary. I take my favorite photo of him that I’ve ever taken. After finals, which pass without too much trouble (though I do have my first in-the-studio-till-close night) we fly back to Colorado for winter break.

January 2010:

Being home is not right and not wrong. It feels somehow like going backwards, but it’s still good to see everyone. I spend more time with Crrr than anyone, which is nice, so nice. We go ice-skating. I love her. When Steele and I get back to Portland, I start the Ensnare series. Something which has been causing angst ever since.

February 2010:

I start to work with a 4×5 camera in photo. I am photographing, for my still life project, old letters and journals. I feel nostalgic. I start working at the front desk on Mondays and Tuesdays until 11:30, which guarantees I will be exhausted for at least half of every week.

March 2010:

I realize that I only have 5 GB left of my hard drive. Very bad news considering the fact that I upload a couple hundred photos to my computer every day. I finish my 25 Possibilities. I buy a pair of floral rain boots. I begin to feel uneasy about the future.

April 2010:

I finish the Ensnare series. I take a short break from Flickr. I start this 30 Day Project, with the idea that it will make the month of April go by faster, getting me to May, getting me to a single week of school remaining. I start a film diary in which I write things down, photograph them, and throw them away. I feel uneasy, uneasy, and restless. I spend more time with Ali. I worry about the summer. I wait anxiously for the summer. Steele and I plan a small road trip. I frantically try to finish all my school work. I miss Crrr. Today while uploading photos, a message popped up “Disk Space Full” I have been deleting things since March.

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Day 27, This month, in great detail

Actually several things have happened within the last month.

1. Cornie and Taylor came to visit, which made me ready to go home and see my friends (what few I have) again.
2. I’ve been noticing how long my hair has gotten. (I know this seems trivial to all of you, by goddamn has it been short for ages. Now it is long enough for me to put in my mouth which is a REALLY bad habit I’ve aquired.)
3. Crrr got me a journal for graduation. I wrote in in twice, then didn’t, but I finally picked it up again at the end of March. This is good because it proves that I am a real person and not just a profile on the internet. This is bad because it makes me realize how totally confused I am about my emotions 90% of the time.
4. A lot of emotional stuff has been going on that I am not comfortable posting to a blog, even one nobody reads.

Anyways. I figured you faceless nameless readers might be tired of the way I was going about these “in detail” posts. So I’ve decided to try a new method, for your sake. (Or just for mine, it’s quite cumbersome to type all that out.) It’s called…. a good ol’ fashioned list.

April 2010:

April 1: The Ceremics club holds a lemonade sale, in which they sale lemonade in hand made ceremic cups. Steele and I bought 5. HAHAHA, we don’t even need to buy dishes for next year.
April 3: My Modernism paper starts showing up in my to-do lists. (You know that I obviously ignore this.)
April 4: I write in my journal: In a year today won’t mean anything, despite everything that I’m worrying about.
April 7: The day before my crit for my Photo portrait series. I am frantically printing all day long, and I feel like it is the project in which I have produced my worst work.
April 8: For drawing, I make a small symbol drawing, which is about Steele and I. On it I put tally marks for how many days we’ve been together. 846 days, as of April 8.
April 10: I start to feel restless for summer. I write in my journal: There’s so much stuff I want to DO. Ugh, it’s unbearable how much time I spend thinking about these things and not doing them.
April 14: I meet with Mark (my photo teacher) about what work I should submit for a scholarship. Afterwards, I go shoot film for my new project, a landscape project for which I am shooting parking lots.
April 15: I write in my journal: Everytime I have a dream it feels so familiar. Like I’ve had it before a million times. But I have no way of knowing.
April 17: I drop off the photos for the scholarship. I write in my journal: I try to capture what I see or imagine but maybe what I see just ins’t as beautiful as what other people do.
April 20: I make the ink video, and mail four letters. (Two of them are free prints, so I’m not sure they count as letters though.) I write in my journal: I feel so passionless. I can’t wait for summer.
April 23: I turn my Modernism paper in.
April 26: I write in my journal: Why am I always second guessing myself?
April 27: I take a self portrait I rather like. (My hair looks long.) I finish a book. I hate my design class. I miss by best friend. I feel confused. I want the school year to end.

And now I am here, writing this blog, listening to ‘Star Mile’ by Joshua Radin. I have to number my edition of prints still, for the exchange. I will be at work for another hour, then I will tumble into bed and sleep until 7:30, or 7:40, or 7:50.

Day 26, My week, in great detail

Exactly a week ago it was Monday, the 19th. I was sitting at the front desk at 11:45, just like I am right now. I was working on my 8-10 page Modernism paper. I probably went home and collapsed into bed. I don’t get off until 12:30, which means I don’t get to bed until at least 1.

On Tuesday I would have woken up at 7:30 (or 7:40, or 7:50) to get to Design at 8. In design we had to give an oral proposal of our idea for the body extension project. (I proposed to make very long glasses with multiple lenses.) We we all in a circle, around a table, and I kept falling asleep. (In a very bright classroom, mind you!) Which was pretty embarrassing. At 11:30, I had Photo. I developed some images. One came out fine. The other came out too dark, but I like it. It’s probably not okay to print it, but I might anyways. Just to spite the man. (Or something.) I take some photos of ink moving in water. I’m off to Art History. I don’t fall asleep. I got back home after, and put together a video with the images I took until 9:30, when I have to work again. And again, I work on my Modernism paper. I almost finish. But I don’t. Sometime in this day, I write in my journal: My thoughts don’t make much sense sometimes, but if I don’t write them down I forget them entirely and there’s something sad about not knowing what’s in your own head.

Wednesday I have drawing, a work day for our series project. I get frustrated because mine isn’t going the way I want, and I spend a lot of the class moping around. I guess I should write more of my thoughts down, because I don’t remember too much from this day. I edit my Modernism paper. Blah-blah-blah.

Thursday I get up for design, go, have nothing to do, and leave at 10. (which is early) I promptly go back to sleep until 11:20, just in time for photo. I must have done something in photo, why can’t I remember? Did I develop film? If I did, I can’t remember shooting more images. Hmmph. Okay, anyways. AH, blah blah blah. After AH, and after Steele leaves for Design, I pump myself up to shoot the next (and last) ensnare shoot. Which I do. It goes fine and I am pleased. I edit the photo, post it, and feel accomplished. Then I do the bibliography for my Modernism paper. (Can you see a trend here, with the Modernism paper?) I am supposed to also write a small essay, which I don’t, which will be the death of me.

Friday I turn in my Modernism paper!!! Yay! Steele goes golfing with Beth afterwords (boring) and I hang out with Ali. We go to a really yummy cafe, where she sketches some people and I contemplate starting a 100 Strangers Project. (But I am scared, and don’t know if I can do it.) We go shopping at some thrift stores and I buy nothing, and she buys overalls. Then we go to the Dollar Tree (Hooray!) where I buy 6 pairs of glasses for my Design project. Joy. Ali’s mom makes us dinner and we watch a movie, and I go to bed, where I have a vivid zombie dream featuring my Aunt Koko and all her kids. (Not as zombies, they all kick ass at zombie fighting.)

Saturday I lay in bed with Steele watching TV. House, Lost, Project Runway. We go out to Home Depot to get even more Design supplies, and buy groceries. We come home and make yummy sandwiches. Then I have to work at 5. I go to work, bored out of my mind now that I don’t have to write my Modernism paper.

Sunday you know all about if you read my last blog. But I did forget to say that I took a nice long shower.

AND today, I have been to drawing, where my project has turned around for the better. I went to Modernism, and found out I got an A- on my paper! Woooo. I’ve been reading some fanfiction, and a book I posted about earlier, Sloppy Firsts. I developed the film I shot yesterday, and it came out fine except for the only image I like, I accidentally scratched. Boo. I flatten all my prints for the exchange. Mm. Steele and I go to Starbucks,I help him with his design project. Now I am here. Listening to ‘Sweet Surrender’ and typing this up when I should have been re-writing an AH paper I need to raise the grade on.

Day 25, My day, in great detail

The alarm clock goes off at 8 am. Steele snoozes it and I wake up again at 9, and promptly go back to sleep. I wake up again at 10. (the time I am supposed to be leaving the house for the photo studio.) I get up, get dressed in one of Crrr’s tops, and leave Steele sleeping in the bedroom. I get a bowl of Cap’n Crunch, only to find that it was been invaded by ants. Boo. 😦 I read a few chapters of a fanfiction, despite the fact that I’m already late for my photo work.

I go back in the bedroom to tell Steele I’m leaving. He’s still asleep. But he’s nice and warm and snuggly so I kiss him on the head and wake him up. Then I finally leave. Wednesday the 28th is the Photography Department Print Exchange, and I have to make an 18 print edition in order to participate. (I will be getting prints in return) I decided to print a negative from my portrait assignment (Which I realize none of you have seen, I’m working on that…) Here’s how printing and edition works: I set up my enlarger, etc. etc. I make a few (four, to be exact) test strips to determine my exposure time. (For future reference: 12 seconds, at f11 with a number 4 filter.) I make a test print to assure that all is in order. I develop it, stop it, fix it, and dry it make sure it looks gooooood. It does. All of this takes over an hour, blech. Now I have to expose 18 sheets of paper with that same exposure, and develop them all, stop them all, fix them all, hypo-clear them all, and wash them all. Whew. I expose 9 at a time, develop 3 at a time, and once those 3 are in the fix I start with the next 3. Processing all these takes a good 3 hours. Somewhere in that three hours I have a mini fantasy/daymare that I am in the darkroom printing while all the while a ZOMBIE is on the loose around the campus. Ahhh. I look around the darkroom to see if there’s any weapons. Nada. I come to the conclusion that I’ll have to stab the zombie with a pen until it dies. I accept that I’ll be the “hot interesting photo girl” in the story who dies within 10 minutes of the intro.

While my prints are in the wash I hang out in the computer lab, reading more fanfiction. I also bring up a Modernism reading, so that when people walk by I can quickly act like I am NOT on a site with a pink background, which boasts the title “Granger Enchanted” At 3:15 or so, I pull all my prints from the wash and put ’em on the drying racks…to dry. I head home ready to see a masterful drawing from Steele. I walk in the door… to discover he has accomplished mere inches on his drawing. He is at his computer, watching some sports thingy with has really obnoxious commentators. Bah. It’s 4:30. He is in desperate need of art supplies and has to run out real quick before Art Media closes at 5. While he’s gone I make myself a bowl of ramen noodles and read more fanfiction. When he gets back, after he eats, we leave to go shoot some film for my new photo assignment. (Landscape.) I am shooting parking lots. We get to the stop of a spectacularly empty parking garage, only to be kicked out by a measly security guard. Grrr. We drive to the mall, shoot a couple of frames, and I get depressed because my project isn’t going so well. But I guess that’s what I get for decided to photograph empty lots of pavement.

We drive downtown to another mall, but find nothing worthwhile. On the way back we stop at a small parking lot and I shoot off one more frame. Such success, I have shot 3 sheets of film.

But the time we get back it’s past 7. I open up the cabinets and decide to make some strawberry Jello. Yum. After that, Steele and I open up our computers and read the handout for Modernism. We debate on what to do next: Go up to the studio and work on drawing or go up to the photo studio and shoot some photos for one of Steele’s paintings. We end up in the bedroom, talking about completely random stuff which is nice because it feels like we haven’t really talked like that in forever, even though we live together. I feel guilty for not working on drawing, by not guilty enough. Steele gets up to go to the bathroom, and I realize I have yet to write this blog. “I have to write my blog!” I shout, and I get up to walk to the living room and open up my computer. And here I am, typing up way too much. Steele is next to me, singing me some songs. (Tilly and the Wall to be specific)

It’s 11:56 pm. And now it’s time for bed, for I have to get up for an 8 am class tomorrow. πŸ™‚

Day 24, Whatever tickles my fancy

This doesn’t really tickle my fancy, I guess. But it is on my mind.
I’m not posting this for pity, I’m posting it to document my life. d

Day 23, A youtube video

So, to give credit, it wasn’t me who found this. I originally saw it on Crrr’s tumblr. πŸ™‚ Either way, it’s worth 3 minutes and 27 seconds of your day.

Day 22, A website

http://www.rubenbrulat.com

This is the website of a very inspiring photographer living in Paris. I’m actually not entirely sure how I found his website–perhaps an art blog?

The images he posts are completely amazing, and have inspired me so much already. I am in complete awe looking at them. I’m not going to post any here because that would defeat the point of a website post! But to anyone looking at this, please please take a look at his work.

Day 21, A reciepe

Awesome Cobbler
Batter:
1/4 c. butter
1/2 c. white sugar
1 c. flour
1/4 t. salt
2 t. baking powder
1/2 c. milk

Fruity goodness:
2 c. fresh peaches (or any fruit really, I’ve used raspberries, apples, strawberries, pears, etc. And combinations are delicious too.)
1/4 c. white sugar
1 c. water
1 t. cinnamon

1. Preheat oven to 365 degrees. Lightly butter 9×9 inch glass pan. (Or whatever baking dish is reasonably sized.)
2. Cream the butter and 1/2 c. sugar.
3. In seperate bowl mix flour, salt, and baking poweder. Add to the creamed mixture alternately with the milk.
4. Spread mixture evenly into baking dish.
5. Spoon fruit over batter, sprinkly with cinnamon and sugar. Poor water over the stop.
6. Bake for 45-55 mintues.
7. EAT!!!!!!

*I totally came up with the name on the spot. In my reciepe book it’s untitled, I just know it on sight.

Day 20, A Hobby of mine

*A quick note on hobbies–they do not have Hobby Lobby’s here in Oregon. The first time I mentioned one people looked at me like I was talking about some unknown disease. Now everytime I am in dire need of craft supplies (which is often as I go to a craft school…) I always say “Well we could go to Hobb… I mean, Michales.”

So, a hobby. Oh that’s a tough one. I think everything I do I do for class. Drawing, sketching, journaling, collaging, etc.

I like to make little books. I’m taking a bookarts class next year and I’m super excited. I’m not very good right now, obviously, because I don’t really know how I just kind of make stuff up.

This is a mini calander! It has old film photos of mine for the pictures πŸ™‚

And this is a little book I made for someone on Flickr. It has a Valentines day story in it πŸ™‚

But, sigh, next year when I’m taking bookarts, will it really be a hobby anymore? It’ll just be class work.

Day 19, A talent of mine

For some reason I feel weird posting a blog which proclaims photography as my talent. But sadly, there is nothing else I can do, and therefore nothing else I can post on. I’ve put some of the images I’m proud of below, and you can be the judge of talent.